I just watched the interview with Oprah and Sarah Ferguson. For those who don’t know, Sarah Ferguson, Dutchess of York was caught on film orchestrating a plan to compromise the privacy of Prince Andrew.
Sarah Ferguson admits, she was on a downward spiral for many years before she finally hit bottom. She attributes the downfall to a long struggle with perfectionism and self-hate.
Basically, Sarah Ferguson spent 25+ years of her life not feeling “good enough” and eventually the feeling took over her life and lead her on a path of self-destruction.
I have no words of criticism for Sarah Ferguson as I’m sure many do. In fact, her experience mirrors my own and I hope her public testimony serves as a wake up call for the millions of people who are stuck in a similar predicament.
It was approximately 2-3 years ago that I hit a similar bottom, and I had been spiraling “out of control” for many years prior. The cause was the same, constant self-criticism and fear of facing my demons.
Eventually, I had no choice. I faced the demons and began to reconnect with myself; the me I would be if I didn’t care so much about what other people think.
I can now appreciate hitting bottom and I love my re-created life! Everyday I break through more of my fears. Every day I become more “me” and life is filled with joy, creativity and happiness once again.
I am a person who grew up poor. I lived on financial assistance, wore hand-me-downs and got free lunch at school. But for some reason, I was expected to and tried to live up to the standards of a princess. I was drowning in a sea of unrealistic expectations and self-hate. There was always something I thought I could do or say to be “better.”
My interests were things like climbing trees, listening to music and roller skating. I loved to hula-hoop, dance and sing. I didn’t want to be a princess but I did want to be Nadia Komenich or Farrah Fawcett or a roller-derby girl on the L.A. Thunderbirds. My choices were constantly unsupported and I wasn’t strong enough to “do it anyway.”
But now, I am.
Today, hula-hooping, roller skating, roller derby, singing and dancing are a part of my daily life.
I am not afraid to speak my truth. I do it on YouTube, on my blogs (Get Galvanized and icreatehabits.com), on Facebook and on The Sheri and Erin Show. I am finding people who love, honor and cherish me as I am and I’m learning to have the same respect for myself.
I applaud Sarah Ferguson for describing the depths of her self-hate while she is in it. That takes guts. I wouldn’t have wanted anyone to see me on T.V. two years ago. It’s much safer to talk about the problem in retrospect but the real healing comes when you are ready to face what is, right now.
If you are in a sea of self-hate today, you don’t have to be ashamed and you don’t have to stay stuck or get worse. There are ways to break free. A few resources I would like to recommend are:
Hypnosis
The book From Sabotage to Success
Holosynch
